00:00:00:00 - 00:00:41:14
Thais
Hello and welcome to the Personal Development School podcast. I'm your host. Thais Gibson, and I create regular podcast episodes to teach you about your relationships, attachment style and the subconscious mind. My goal of this podcast is to give you tools and awareness you need to thrive in your relationships, feel deeply connected, and find harmony and fulfillment in your relationships and personal life. So I hope you tune in here with me each and every week.

00:00:41:14 - 00:00:43:00
Thais
So the first thing

00:00:43:00 - 00:00:49:23
Thais
I really want to share with you is it's really important to audit why you got there so there is a failure in your life.

00:00:49:23 - 00:01:08:22
Thais
Like, please keep in mind, failure is just one little piece of a bigger puzzle. It's like you can look at one piece of that puzzle and you can say, This is the whole puzzle that is just not accurate. Like we're going to go through many little failures in life all the time, but we don't know yet what the whole grand picture of our life is going to be built out to be.

00:01:08:24 - 00:01:35:17
Thais
And we can turn this sort of grand scheme of everything into a beautiful puzzle. If we choose to learn from our failures and to get back up and to not really judge ourselves so harshly, but to learn to introspect intensively. So beating ourselves up and going, I'm not good enough, I'm a failure. All these different things that doesn't serve, but taking accountability and responsibility for our lives by looking at what didn't go the way we wanted it to and going, okay, what caused that?

00:01:35:17 - 00:01:57:03
Thais
What were the root causes? What brought us to that place? The moment I failed, what were my fears driving that failure? What were the unmet needs in my life? What were the patterns that were showing up for me that I maybe wasn't paying attention to were the red flags I didn't look at like what was going on and how could I work on breaking through those patterns so that I can create change long term?

00:01:57:05 - 00:02:21:14
Thais
And if we are able to do that and really introspect about failures and give them meaning in terms of like introspection, in terms of judgment or going to give a lot less emotional energy to basically nothing by just beating ourselves up and a lot more emotional energy and thought energy and mental energy in general into being part of a solution until like picking ourselves up and driving forward.

00:02:21:16 - 00:02:40:19
Thais
Number two, we want to be able to have a solution oriented mindset that's backed by strategies. Okay, So what this means is once we've audited from step number one, sort of what got us to this point, we can't just be like, okay, great. Now I know we have to say, okay, great, now I know and how do we execute creating a change.

00:02:40:22 - 00:02:59:22
Thais
And so this really means if we realize that, you know what, I failed at this thing because I was rushing, I was rushing through and I was so focused on the solution that I didn't pay enough attention to the details. Then you can't just say, okay, great, I learned that you say, okay, what are some strategies I can put together to execute change next time?

00:02:59:25 - 00:03:21:17
Thais
What are boundaries I need to have or what are some things to really implement when it comes to setting goals? Maybe I need to start extending my timelines and so instead of piling everything on my plate at once, like what are the things that I can actually do that become actionable? So that I can begin to create the changes that I would like to see, And I can disrupt the patterns that might have led to the failure to begin with.

00:03:21:19 - 00:03:46:13
Thais
Number three, it's very valuable to do a quarterly audit of the seven areas of your life. Okay, So audits really I think some important things to include are strengths, weaknesses, healthy habits versus unhealthy habits and how I'm showing up as a person to communicate, to set to set boundaries and to participate in interpersonal relationships. Because relationship type relationships touch every other area of our lives.

00:03:46:19 - 00:04:08:16
Thais
We have relationships in the workplace. We have friendships and family relationships. We romantic relationships. We have a relationship to our finances. Everything is a relationship at the end of the day. And so we want to be able to recognize how much interpersonal relationships spill into everything and how much just everything that we are doing. Each area of life literally, we have a relationship to sort of under the same umbrella there.

00:04:08:19 - 00:04:24:12
Thais
And so the seven areas of life you want to focus on your career financial, mental, emotional, spiritual, physical and relationships. And we want to do a quarterly audit and we just want to look at and like, how do they show up? Well, what were some of the weaknesses for me or the place? They didn't show up as well.

00:04:24:15 - 00:04:41:28
Thais
What are the healthy habits that I had? What are the unhealthy habits? You know, what were the things that were lacking that were missing? How could I develop healthier habits going forward and so on? And by doing this, you're constantly course correcting your life. And over a year, five years, ten years, you wouldn't believe how much this pays off.

00:04:41:28 - 00:05:06:06
Speaker 1
So I have some really exciting news and it's that integrated attachment theory training is back. In other words, you can be trained to become a relationship coach, certified an integrated attachment theory in literally 60 days. So who is this for? Well, of course it is for any individual who wants to make an impact and really be of service to others while also obtaining freedom and flexibility and abundance in their lives.

00:05:06:08 - 00:05:34:18
Speaker 1
And this is also for anybody who is already a counselor, a therapist, a coach, and just really wants to expand their toolkit. We've had so many people enter into the Integrated Attachment Theory program because they're just looking to obtain a certain degree of mastery in terms of understanding their own attachment patterns and also the attachment patterns of maybe their children or partner or other loved ones in their lives so they can really support those people and understand them more deeply.

00:05:34:21 - 00:05:51:25
Speaker 1
So please keep in mind that the last two times we ran this program, we filled up very fast. In fact, we oversold the programs and sold out completely. So if you're interested that, click the link below to learn more and dive in with me. And I'd love to see you there on the other side before seats run out.

00:05:51:29 - 00:06:13:24
Thais
Number four, this is all about getting in the into the habit of breaking things down into specific actionable steps. I find this is where a lot of people get stuck. So they have this big idea for example, and it's like, I'm going to start X, Y, Z business. But they don't know how to like, translate an idea into like reality, like grounding things into reality.

00:06:13:24 - 00:06:30:00
Thais
And it's like, how do I break this down? What should this idea look like? What are the steps I need to take in order to get there? What are the strategies that need to like jam packed into my life to be able to take those steps? And so it's we stay in this idea mode and we don't make things that are actionable.

00:06:30:00 - 00:06:49:26
Thais
We don't set deadlines for ourselves, especially if we're like self-starting and we don't have this ability to like keep refining in fine tuning because we don't keep writing things down and keeping things in front of us. And I find that when people are struggling, they're struggling with failure. It's it's this is a huge principle as to why it's like people have this idea.

00:06:49:29 - 00:07:08:11
Thais
They sort of dabble in the idea. They take some steps. But unless you have like a clear plan with steps, with strategies to support the steps, you can really get stuck. So let me just give you an example. Let's say I want to start a business. I can't just be like, I want to start a business, and then like talk to some people and like go to a networking event or two.

00:07:08:13 - 00:07:31:23
Thais
I need like a full scale plan that says, okay, if I'm going to start a business in consulting, okay, here's what I'm going to do. I'm going to, you know, get clear on all the things I'll need to build my business. So a business plan, maybe an office location, you know, maybe a whole bunch of networking events will do speaking engagements like you have to sort of map out everything, and then you have to box these things in.

00:07:31:23 - 00:07:55:08
Thais
So Monday evenings, I'll do speaking events, Tuesday evenings I'll go to networking events, Wednesday evenings I will do X, Y, Z, Thursday evenings. And you have to have everything mapped out and that they're actually time boxed until like, here's what I'll do. And then once you have the time boxed into the steps you need to feed into getting out of your full time job and starting a business, you don't need to be able to put together some useful strategies.

00:07:55:08 - 00:08:28:03
Thais
So like, Well, I'm at the networking event. How will I show up? Will I have an elevator pitch for people? Will I give out business cards? Will I like what are my strategies to drive that going forward? And this is extremely, extremely important. And the number five, we have to learn to motivate ourselves at the subconscious level. If we just have conscious goals are subconscious mind will always be like this tailwind we experience where we're trying to take steps forward and our subconscious mind keeps pulling us back and that's because the conscious mind cannot or will overpower the subconscious mind.

00:08:28:06 - 00:08:45:10
Thais
So it's going to be of the utmost importance that you learn to like literally implant these goals you have at the subconscious level. And there's some really powerful tools for doing this. One of the first things you can remember at a high level is the more emotion you have linked to a goal, the more likely it is to imprint your subconscious.

00:08:45:10 - 00:09:03:18
Thais
It's a powerful tool or sort of tip more than a tool for reprograming. And if you want to do a much deeper dive into reprograming your subconscious, I have a full length course in a tremendous amount of detail with 21 major tools you can use to reprogram your subconscious. It comes with healthy habits, a big workbook, a checklist,

00:09:03:18 - 00:09:04:00
Thais
And

00:09:04:00 - 00:09:07:21
Thais
it will literally equip you with all the things you need to know about your subconscious mind in general.