00:00:00:01 - 00:00:03:09
Thais Gibson
I've come a long way because I used to have like no boundaries when people were in pain. I used to be like, Just come here, I'll go take care of you.
but now I'm like learning to still consider myself a lot more in the process when people really close to me are going through challenging

00:00:13:08 - 00:00:58:00
Mike DiZio
Hello and welcome to the Personal Development School Podcast. I am so excited you are here. I am your co-host, Titus Gibson, along with our new special host, Mike Vizio. This is a podcast that discusses everything related to integrated attachment theory. The New attachment theory, along with the subconscious mind relationships, communication needs boundaries and so much more. Throughout this podcast, you'll see a series of episodes I upload with new information, educational tips, all about how to thrive in relationships and really master your emotional state in your life, along with special guests hosted by Mike Zito to discuss all of these amazing topics and longer form content.

00:00:58:02 - 00:01:05:16
Mike DiZio
Thank you so much for being here and I really hope you enjoy this episode.

00:01:05:16 - 00:01:34:01

Welcome personal development, school members, listeners and podcast watchers. We're back here today for another great podcast with me, your host Mike. And as you can see, Times Gibson's here with us. How you doing today? I'm awesome. I'm excited to be here with you. So today we thought we would sort of chat a little bit. I'm going to tell you sort of the story of how me and Tice met some of the things along the way and like how we know each other, because I'm sure some of you are like through this Mike guy and how does he fit in with space?

00:01:34:03 - 00:01:53:02

So I want to let everybody know sort of our story and our background in history. It's a pretty interesting one. And then we're going to tell some viewer questions that were submitted and just kept to notice a little bit more, a little bit more beneath the surface and under the layers. So I think you'll enjoy today's podcast. It should be pretty exciting and informative.

00:01:53:04 - 00:02:14:17

So Tice, I just want to start and let our viewers know sort of the story about how we met. Is it okay if I tell everyone that? Yeah, of course. Of course. Okay. So basically this one is about tell you interject at any time if I'm telling the story differently or it's not how you remember. I know scientifically, they say every time you tell a story, it actually changes a little bit each time.

00:02:14:21 - 00:02:30:20

But I think I remember the story pretty well because it was it was very impactful for me. So it was about eight or nine years ago, and I was out for a friend's birthday party. And at the time I was going through a really, really bad depression. I was not happy. I was things were not going get in my life.

00:02:30:22 - 00:02:49:11

It was just a very challenging time in my life. And at that time being very much a people pleaser and codependent, I felt I had to be there for my friend's birthday even though I was really like dying on the inside. So I went to this event and I was there with my friends and I was just barely holding it together.

00:02:49:15 - 00:03:11:02

And I thought nobody could really notice or was hoping nobody could notice. And Tice, you were also at the same public event. And at some point we kind of crossed paths and you stop me and you asked me like, are you okay? And I was kind of like, taken aback. I was like, Yeah, I like why? And she's like, I don't know, like, you know, not really look into it.

00:03:11:02 - 00:03:25:08

And I was like, Oh, geez. Like, I guess I'm not hiding it that well. We sort of started talking and I explained just things are going to well, and, you know, my life's not the best right now. And then you said, Well, listen, would you take help from a stranger? And I was kind of like I was desperate.

00:03:25:08 - 00:03:43:17

So I was like, Yeah, I guess so. And then you said, Somebody help me when I was going through a tough period years ago and I would like to help you and do the same for you. Yeah. And I was like, Okay. Like, I was desperate. I would have done anything. So you gave me your information and we went our separate ways.

00:03:43:17 - 00:04:10:00

And then after I contacted you and then we started going for regular coffees and meeting up and you really, like, started teaching me stuff that I had no clue about, but it was so exciting because I actually felt like, Wow, there's a way out of feeling depressed and feeling anxious and just having all these these issues. I just thought I was defective and, you know, I was given like a faulty brain and there's just no way out of it.

00:04:10:02 - 00:04:30:14

So meeting you and then you starting me on that path and teaching me about your subconscious mind reprograming like all sorts of stuff, it was really exciting for me. Before I go on, is that is that pretty much how you remember? That's actually such a cool story. Like, it's funny because we've known each other for so long and like, yeah, you know, you feel like family to me and it's like, I like, it's like, Wow.

00:04:30:15 - 00:04:51:24

Like, that was such a cool way of connecting through things. And yeah, like, I remember, like, seeing you and I remember thinking your body language was like. Like, you look so sad and like, Oh my gosh, this poor guy. And it was interesting because, like, I'll say, a shoutout to a dear friend of mine, Ruben. But, you know, I was going through a really hard time years before that.

00:04:51:24 - 00:05:07:11

And that person really came into my life and like really changed the course of my life and kind of like a mentorship way by like teaching me things and sharing things with me. And it was like, so life changing like that. He was such a catalyst in my life as I was healing and getting into such a good place.

00:05:07:11 - 00:05:24:20

And I was like working with clients, but I just felt like I wanted to like, shout everything from the rooftop all the time. Like, as much as for you, it was probably like, helpful to go through. That for me was helpful to just like, keep sharing with people, you know? And I was like in my space, like working with people, but like, just I felt like I was just pouring, like it was pouring out of me to want to share and heal and help.

00:05:24:20 - 00:05:41:14

And and so, like, I really enjoyed all those times where we'd go through, stop and like, talk about different things and like sharing it. And it was so nice and I felt like you transformed so much and like, I got to see you go through all these really, really cool shifts and changes and yeah, it was, it was a really cool way to start a friendship.

00:05:41:16 - 00:06:00:06

And it's amazing. I think you shared once to that because of sort of you saw how much I changed and how quickly I changed. It sort of gave you confidence to like, wow, like I could really impact people. And this information that I'm sharing is having a real impact. And it sort of gave you a bit of motivation to really want to deliver it to the world, basically.

00:06:00:06 - 00:06:15:03

Yeah, Yeah, 100% for sure. Like through like a lot of those periods of time, it was like, okay, well, why don't you just teach and teach and teach? And that's when I started giving the workshops for free. Like all that kind of stuff. And then you join me in there and accompany me to a lot of that kind of stuff.

00:06:15:03 - 00:06:41:08

And yeah, it's so crazy because it was only like nine years ago or whatever. Yeah, yeah. And also like a lifetime ago, like, it's like, yeah, especially good memories. Like you touched on the workshops, like we used to rent spaces around Toronto and other areas and sort of fill a room with like 30, 40, 50 people. And I just want to share like I was always, first of all, I was so much fun, Like, it was so fun sort of doing that.

00:06:41:08 - 00:06:56:13

And, you know, even just setting up the room and taking it down and greeting people like it was just such a fun little process. What I always felt was amazing and you're still doing it to this day is how you would bring someone on stage and not know anything that they're going to ask and just be like, What is going on for you?

00:06:56:13 - 00:07:15:06

What's your biggest challenge right now? And they would say what they're going through. And some people's things were really heavy. And I remember being like, Oh my gosh, if I was up there with no preparation, like I was nervous for you, but then you would just come through with like such good, good responses, then hold space so well for the people.

00:07:15:08 - 00:07:35:12

And by the end of it, they were just crying, some of the people. So it was just unbelievable. Each time you did that, I was always just like blown away. So it was fun to watch you sort of your evolution as a coach and supporting other people as well. Thank you and thank you for being there for all of that and doing that with me because like I needed help and support through that whole time.

00:07:35:12 - 00:07:51:05

Like there's so much to organize and do and like, yeah, that's just really appreciate that. I feel like I think in my personality a little bit to just dive headfirst into things and then kind of put them out, you know, but in a good way for sure. You're fearless, that's for sure. Or maybe you have your fears, but we don't know.

00:07:51:11 - 00:08:08:15

That could be a good question for later. We want to know what are your fears? Okay. And then lastly, just to let sort of our audience know, just like we'd been friends for so long and then there might have been a period where we had just been busy and gone our separate ways. There was no like issue, but we just sort of lost connection for a bit.

00:08:08:21 - 00:08:29:08

And then I remember one day, about three and a half years ago, I was in an airport in Florida and I was going to Nicaragua for a vacation and you messaged me and I was like, Oh, I was really excited to hear from you. And you told me you started the personal development school and started telling me about attachment theory and you're trying to guess what my attachment style was.

00:08:29:10 - 00:08:45:20

And for me, I was like, I'd never heard of this before in my life. I was like, This is very interesting, but wow, I've never heard of this. And you basically asked, like, if I wanted to be a part of the team and I was like, I'm all in because, you know, we had such a good history and you help me before in the past.

00:08:45:20 - 00:09:03:13

So I guess I have a lot of trust where if you you're doing something, I know that you're sort of going all in. It's probably something that's going to be helping a lot of people. So I happily accepted. You know, you train me and I got to watch all the videos and understand attachment theory and yeah, it's been great.

00:09:03:13 - 00:09:21:09

It's been three years now and it's helped me. It's helped me change my relationships. And I'm proud to be part of the journey with you. And that's amazing. Yeah. And I feel like one thing I appreciate about you so, so much because you and I both kind of understand this. It's like sometimes life is busy and, like, things happen and we always just, like, pick back up from where we left off.

00:09:21:09 - 00:09:40:01

And like, I really appreciate that about you. And it was exciting to sort of see. And it's so funny too, because I feel like and you know, correct me if I'm wrong, but I feel like you're in like your ultimate zone that you should be doing for a living. There's you think it's like you get to like help people, support people, contribute, socialize without it being, like, too overwhelming.

00:09:40:01 - 00:09:56:04

At the same time, you can kind of like there's like a novelty and like a fun in it and like a lightness. And I feel like it like is exactly like where you should be for sure. And it's it's so nice to have that because I spent most of my life going career to career and job to job.

00:09:56:04 - 00:10:13:12

Like maybe one day I'll do like a solo class and I'll let everybody know about sort of my journey and what I've been through. But one of the main things was I never trusted my intuition or my feelings or what I wanted to do. I started to grow, but it was all where I was told what I should do and what I shouldn't do.

00:10:13:12 - 00:10:34:03

And no, that's not a good idea. Don't do that. So I never trusted my own internal guidance system and my own feelings and emotions. So it is really beautiful to see that once you do start doing that, it leads to like amazing things. Yeah. So yeah, that's, that's, that's the journey, folks. And this is how we met and how sitting in this chair.

00:10:34:05 - 00:10:57:14

So I hope that was interesting for you. Okay, so we're going to get into sort of a few questions. I have some viewer questions that were submitted, some from inside the personal development school. So you ready to answer some questions? Ready? Ready. Okay. First question, probably the most important question that we got so far. People want to know, how is Bob?

00:10:57:16 - 00:11:23:15

How Bob? Well, Bob goes through his goodbye and Bob has better days than others. But Bob will continuously work on himself until he never becomes securely attached, because we use Bob for too many live examples of other pain point, in other words, of okay, but we love them, even though he might never become figure. Okay, another member question Are you even human?

00:11:23:17 - 00:11:50:18

I am super human. Yeah, not like a super human, but I am. Is that human? Okay, so getting a little more into the nitty gritty. How did you know you're in love with your husband? And what gave you a sense of certainty that you were choosing the right partner? You know what? Like, what really stands out to me is for sure, with my husband, one thing that stood up to him so like to me with him so much is like a year and a half or so to our relationship.

00:11:50:20 - 00:12:20:12

We're kind of going through like, you know, your power struggle. Like we we moved in together like a year and three months or something into dating. And for me, like, there were so little things that were difficult and like in that power struggle stage, you know, like he was originally a dismissive, avoidant and I still was I had done a lot of work at that point, but definitely still had, like I say, parts left because I hadn't worked on like my attachment style specifically, just like a lot of hormones and like a lot of emotional regulation, a lot of like communicating better.

00:12:20:12 - 00:12:42:22

But I still had like work to do on boundaries and didn't quite realize it to the degree at the time. And I remember thinking, okay, like I'm going to be really communicative about what's not working for me and be really upfront. I have to get better at expressing my needs because I could see that the things that were bothering me were also the whole lack of me communicating and still operating a little bit under like corporate contracts in certain ways.

00:12:42:24 - 00:13:07:18

And I realized, okay, that's me issue, but I have to see how he responds. I'm like, one thing that was so, so, so, so helpful for me and like, I appreciate so much to this day. It's like he's always willing to show up, take accountability, have the conversation grow with me. And like, that was really apparent to me when we were like trying to work out little things in the power struggle stage and like, as long as I communicated that he would always show up.

00:13:07:18 - 00:13:27:21

And so that to me was like probably the most important quality to me that I could look for. And like a husband, like a life partner, like all of those things. And I definitely I never look, I made the right choice. Like, I'm very happy about that to this day because I feel like just so many little things like you go through life or challenges or different shifts or things that happen.

00:13:27:21 - 00:13:50:12

And like a lot of them in our relationship have been from like the external world, like lots of family challenges with like death and loss like a couple of years back or things like that. And I just feel like he is such a supportive person and like really, really shows up 110%. So it's like two of the most important qualities to me, or probably communication, like being willing to communicate like from both sides and being willing to show up and grow together through things.

00:13:50:12 - 00:14:17:19

And if I had to, like backtrack and say, okay, what would the two things be that I would pick in a life partner that are most important? I would probably say those two things. Wow, that's really great. And the fact like him coming from an avoidant background, like those probably early vulnerable conversation or like really uncomfortable for him, but know he cared about you and loved you enough to sit through sort of those things and at least try to communicate and hear what you're saying and work on the issues that were coming up.

00:14:18:00 - 00:14:43:07

Definitely Kudos to your husband for that. I keep saying your husband. Can I say his name? Yeah. You got to get through. Watch it. Okay, excellent. Thank you for sharing that. So how much teaching or PDFs info did you bring into the relationship so you can have effective discussions with your partner? How much was he open to learn on his own and what's like a good balance of the two?

00:14:43:09 - 00:15:03:09

Yeah, it's a really good question. So it's funny. Like I do want to say we've instead of going on eight years or so now, and when I first started my practice, working with clients, like my big focus was the subconscious mind. Like it wasn't attachment theory in those early days. So it was really about the subconscious mind. I had done a lot of reconditioning around like traumas that I hadn't dealt with and things I had to work through.

00:15:03:09 - 00:15:24:15

And it was really a lot around like core wounds and then like learning my needs and to, you know, my own needs is really where it started. And like when I was in my early days of client practice, like it wasn't like the whole framework for integrated attachment theory was already established. I was kind of bumping my way around through things like taking different certifications, learning a lot of things through like case studies and clients and and all that kind of stuff.

00:15:24:15 - 00:15:43:08

So it wasn't like there was like PDF info yet I was just working in a client practice, knew a lot about the subconscious mind, had done a lot of like education and work and was like in this like early stage of those things. And it's funny because I did a lot of like, you know, learn to meet your own needs, learn to emotionally regulate, recondition trauma, heal trauma, heal car wounds.

00:15:43:08 - 00:16:01:17

But I hadn't done like a lot of like the relationship oriented stuff. A lot of it was like in my own independence space first. So even like with him, like, definitely our power struggle part was me learning to use that in a really personal relationship in an interdependent way. And so I didn't I definitely would not say that I was like teaching him at any point.

00:16:01:17 - 00:16:19:14

I definitely wasn't like, Hey, sit down. I'm going to teach how to communicate. Like there wasn't anything like that at all. And I still to this day have a rule like, I'm not going to play like some kind of like counselor role or, you know, that's not going to be how I am with him because I don't want that in a life partner situation.

00:16:19:14 - 00:16:33:08

Like, I want there to be this like equality of support back and forth where we have each other's backs. But what I would say is that I just I took it upon myself to be like, I'm going to know the tools that I know how to use and that I'm learning and I'm going to be integrating these things into the relationship.

00:16:33:08 - 00:16:51:10

So, you know, I'm going to communicate properly from my end and I'm going to share vulnerably from my end, and I'm going to open up and talk about these things. And I would say just like lead by example, I just did like as a human being with tools where I thought was appropriate for me to like, hold myself to the standard and quality of person I wanted to be in the world, right?

00:16:51:10 - 00:17:06:09

So that's what I did. And I would say, like he just followed suit. He just would pay attention, then do those things back or like try to do those things back. And sometimes I have to dig a little bit at things like I'd be like, Well, is it this or is it that? It's like, Which one are you feeling?

00:17:06:09 - 00:17:21:21

But that would be the same type of conversation you'd have with a friend or family member or like just like a human being. So I definitely wouldn't say there was like any teaching. I don't think teaching figure a way of saying it. I would say that I just did what I thought was like the right way of being and doing in a relationship.

00:17:21:23 - 00:17:37:17

And then I was waiting to see, like, is he going to show up back or not? And that's really going to determine how this evolves over the next period of time. And he really like took that on and showed up as well. And I feel like, too, I really believe that as human beings, I think that like we yearn for connection, Like it's one of our basic needs.

00:17:37:17 - 00:17:56:21

We know. And I think that like everybody wants to feel like loved and connected and feel like they can be seen and heard and understood by somebody they're really close to. And so I feel like once one person does that in a relationship, this isn't obviously the case for every person ever. But I find a lot of times and I saw this a lot of my client practices that a lot of times it just gives the other person permission to do the same.

00:17:56:21 - 00:18:10:21

And it's like, Oh, when you're vulnerable, like, Hey, I can also be a little more vulnerable. And when you say what you need, okay, I can also say what I need. And so I feel like it just passes along to the other person. And if you're exposed to something like that a lot, we tend to take it on.

00:18:10:21 - 00:18:27:17

And I feel like it feels like relief to be able to talk openly and to speak more deeply or to let somebody in or to ask for your needs. And so, yeah, so I wouldn't say there's much teaching, but definitely like leading by example, I guess. Yeah, Yeah, I love that there's so much good information in there, but you're talking about relief like it.

00:18:27:17 - 00:18:50:17

It's relief when you can share what's really going on inside for you without shame, without worry judgment, and without worry about your partner getting married like the relief. And that literally, like I could feel my body just like relax and just imagining when I'm with someone who we have such a good communicative relationship. I would you could call it a day with you that with your partner, that's just like you said, you go back and forth.

00:18:50:17 - 00:19:10:19

It's like a tennis match, you know, It's like I'm going to send vulnerability your way and then you could set it back. But working together like, that's so beautiful. And I'm really glad you have that in your marriage right now. That's great. Okay, we have another member question As an urn secure, what is the most challenging thing that you're still experiencing across seven areas of life?

00:19:11:00 - 00:19:26:17

What do you still find triggering and how do you deal with that? Okay. I would say two things that come up for me sometimes. So number one, and this is like I feel like through the lifelong battle, but you know, it's probably my own story. But I do this thing to myself where it's funny, like, I feel like.

00:19:26:18 - 00:19:49:13

So I used to have like a lot of triggers really strong. Like I was like super f I feel all the feelings get triggered, all the boundary issues, all the contracts, the codependency, like you name it. And when I started really like eat, live, breathe, sleep, education, personal development, everything all the time. It was really obvious to me when I was upset, right?

00:19:49:13 - 00:20:20:21

Because I'd be I'd feel anger, my anger, emotions would feel really strong. I'd feel frustration or fear or whatever. Emotions are so easy to recognize. And I would say one of the things that happen and over time is that, like the problems in my life occur now because I'm moving from a place of excitement and then sometimes, like I get excited about things and take on too many things, and then I'm like, No, I took on too many things, but it's like really difficult to recognize where your boundaries are when everything feels like an exciting thing.

00:20:20:21 - 00:20:40:08

And so, you know, I know it's not this huge answer, but it's just the truth of like, what my for sure, like the whole I fall in a lot is that I will be too excited about too many things, take on too many things, and then overwhelming self and then try to like reposition it. And so that seems to be something that I'm trying to figure out exactly how to to break.

00:20:40:08 - 00:20:58:16

I'm trying to like, work on, like really considering myself more and really do like leaving a leeway in my time. Like, I feel like I'll have like a work week and I'll pack everything right in and I'm like, But things are always going to come up. So I have to like, leave leeway for, you know, spare time so that when things come up, they're filled in with that spare time.

00:20:58:16 - 00:21:20:09

And so anyways, that's something I'm working on. And then I would say it's still tricky for me to see people I really, really love and I'm really, really close to. Honestly, people in general, it's still tricky for me to see people in pain whenever I see somebody in pain or suffering or stuck. Like it's also hard to not want to just go stop everything and go be there and support and all those different things.

00:21:20:09 - 00:21:35:04

So, you know, I've come a long way because I used to have like no boundaries when people were in pain. I used to be like, Come here, I'll go take care of you. But but now I'm like learning to still, like, you know, consider myself a lot more in the process when people really close to me are going through challenging time.

00:21:35:04 - 00:21:54:12

So that was of my two points of work that I'm focused on. Oh, yeah, I remember in the early days you'd have like eight or nine coaching clients a day. You'd be working from like 9 a.m. to 9 p.m. You know, I'm going to help these people, you know, and I was talking about this today or talking about this in the webinar today.

00:21:54:12 - 00:22:11:05

I felt like I had done all this work on boundaries up until that point. So I thought I would go with my boundaries. But then what I realized is that, like I still have a hidden space where I was not having boundaries because I would have a story like, I'm fine, I've done all this healing. I've grown so much, like I'm in such a great place.

00:22:11:07 - 00:22:35:03

So like, you know, that person's in pain. So then I should just not have boundaries cause the person's in pain. And I had to learn that. Not at all. Like, you can't weaponize your own empathy against yourself. Like, you still have to learn to have those boundaries. And so, you know, I feel like I've come a really long way with starting that and like, not doing outrageous stuff, like having these really crazy back to back to back to back sessions with people all day long and like, you know, being exhausted at the end.

00:22:35:03 - 00:22:56:04

But but it's still the feeling or the feeling of somebody suffering around you. It's hard to be like, okay, I'm going to still take a step back and mind my boundaries because I have to be good with my boundaries long term and not get burned out or things like that. So it's like learning not to not help people or support people, but to figure out what you can really give in that moment that keeps you in balance.

00:22:56:04 - 00:23:14:08

At the same time. Right, Right. Okay. That makes a lot of sense. Okay. So one of our members asking, what are some signs that the needle is moving for yourself? So when you're doing the healing work, members of our school who are doing the work, taking the courses come to the webinars and you know, and the needle is moving for yourself.

00:23:14:08 - 00:23:30:13

Is that like a general feeling that you feel? Yeah, it's a great question. I would say like some of the big things are you get triggered less intensely when you get triggered and then you'll start noticing it happens less frequently. So I know, like I'll just speak for myself, like I know I would get triggered like a ten out of ten.

00:23:30:18 - 00:23:52:00

A lot of the day is and a lot of the time. And then I notice that suddenly my triggers as I was doing like Reprograming work, became like a six or a five or they became with these manageable things. And then they started happening further and further and further apart. And, you know, I used to be somebody who would get triggered like almost every day or maybe multiple times a day and like, really triggered not like a little bit.

00:23:52:02 - 00:24:10:18

And then it became like, I can't remember the last time I was really triggered by something and and kind of having that realization. It happened slowly that everything sort of space is out. But one day you can look back and go, okay, wow, like my whole internal world has really shifted and changed. So it's like less intense triggers, less frequent triggers.

00:24:10:20 - 00:24:27:19

Or is that I'm sorry to interrupt, but would you say that a bounce back time from triggers without that could be an indicator of and steady? You know, your ten out of ten upset for like two days or somebody doing something that you thought was wrong. What would you say? It's progress if you're the bounce back. Time is a lot shorter hundred percent.

00:24:27:19 - 00:24:46:04

Yeah. Like that's a great one because that's part of it too, right? It's like it doesn't it doesn't feel good to wait that day being triggered or hours and hours being triggered or two days or whatever it is. So like, especially once you have tools and you can question your story, meet your needs, like you're an emotional processing tool or something and move through it quick.

00:24:46:04 - 00:25:12:09

I mean, like that's you got precious time of your life back all the time. So that's a amazing one. Yeah. And then I would also say like learning to communicate your needs more, like when you allow yourself to take up space more often have needs, have boundaries, you know, And as you see coping mechanisms shift, right? Coping mechanisms are like binge watch television or like numb yourself out in some way, but instead of your coping mechanisms start to shift to healthier things, I think that's a natural evolution of the process as well.

00:25:12:11 - 00:25:34:06

Right? Right. That's great. Super helpful. So someone is asking, how do you really love yourself? They're confused as to what that even means to love yourself. What would you say to that? It's a really good question. As maybe funny as it sounds, I think that we naturally are loving people towards ourselves and towards others. And I think it's like there's this like spiritual thing that I really like.

00:25:34:06 - 00:25:55:03

And one of the lines in it is don't put stones in your bowl of light. And like, it's like the analogy that comes to mind where like, I feel like we naturally pour from a place of generosity and care and kindness and like love and openness. But I feel like when we go through trauma and our subconscious mind gets imprinted, it's like we put stones and they start covering up the light that would otherwise shine through.

00:25:55:05 - 00:26:18:11

And it's like, you cover the light and you cover the light and you cover the light. And I feel like loving yourself is something that will come naturally when there's an absence of being really mean to yourself in your internal dialog because you've got a lot of goodwill. And so for anybody who may not know what that means in terms of a core wound, like if you grow up, let's just say, for example, in a critical household or both parents are really critical and they're always like, You got a B-plus, Why wasn't it an A-plus?

00:26:18:11 - 00:26:47:16

Or, you know, nothing seems ever good enough. You know, one example of a core wound that my former Beatle, I'm not good enough. And people can have so many different wounds. I will be betrayed. I am unlovable, I am unworthy and bad. I'll be trapped, helpless, powerless. I'm disrespected, I'm unsafe. There's generally like 18 to 24 wounds. But when we have these big pieces of meaning, they really have a huge impact on our internal dialog and how we speak to our self in our internal dialog and how we really express what we feel towards ourselves as well.

00:26:47:16 - 00:27:03:11

And so I find that when we really reprogram a lot of those core wounds, there is an actual caring compassion for ourselves that shines through. So it's in the absence of these things that, that love is there. But I would say core wounds is a huge part, like being kinder and more compassionate to yourself in your internal dialog.

00:27:03:13 - 00:27:18:00

And then also it's not just how you speak to somebody because you could, for example, have a partner who is like, I love you, I love you, I love you, but then they never speak to you, never hang out with you, never spend time with you, you know, or never allow you to set a boundary or never care about your needs.

00:27:18:02 - 00:27:34:01

And so it's also like the actions that we show to ourselves and those really revolve around how do we treat our own needs, Like, do we make space for them in the world? Do we feel safe honoring them and communicating them to people around us? Do we stop boundaries when something feels like a no for us? And do we honor that, like emotional bandwidth between ourselves and others?

00:27:34:01 - 00:27:51:12

If something doesn't feel right or something feels like a violation? And then it's also going into, you know, how do we treat these other aspects of self as a whole? Like how do we treat our feelings on a daily basis? Do we shun them, dismiss them, shame ourselves for having them, or do we make space to listen to them and listen to the guidance and feedback that they're giving us?

00:27:51:14 - 00:28:13:01

And so I think a huge part of all of this, it's the absence of the traumatic imprints, but also through trauma. Sometimes we learn to ignore boundaries, learn to disown our needs, learn to shame our feelings. And so it's the undoing of those things. And then how do we actually allow ourselves to take up space in a healthy way and be present with ourselves here, ourselves, spend time with ourselves and introspect and reflect on things?

00:28:13:01 - 00:28:32:00

And I think all of those things bring us the love. And an example of it too, as you can think of, like how would you want somebody else to show you love and like, what are the big things you would really want somebody to do for you? And then those are usually the things we're missing most in the relationship to ourselves in terms of how to self-love, whether it's somebody to see us or hear us or make us a priority.

00:28:32:00 - 00:28:52:10

Like what you're yearning for are usually the things that you feel in a sense of learned helplessness to give to self. So that's like the big shift and the sort of deeper work to plug into. Wow, that's so beautiful. That reminds you of that Rumi quote where it's like the love is there, but you just have to remove the objects or the things that are blocking the love from from coming to you.

00:28:52:12 - 00:29:11:02

So we're always like seeking love or trying to go out there and love is outside of us. But the love always has been there, always will be there. But we have to remove sort of the barriers and the obstacles to really access it and feel it on a daily basis. But you really need that. Well, there. That was just amazing.

00:29:11:04 - 00:29:23:08

Okay, so when will we hear a Tyce and Graham podcast? Very soon. Should she's putting it on record. There will be a gravitates focus.

00:29:23:08 - 00:29:56:17
Mike DiZio
So after conducting many polls and surveys at the Personal Development School over the past few years, we have found that students come in and 92% of them become dominantly, securely attached within 90 days. If they focus on six crucial areas, the six crucial areas have to do with what it takes to become secure. According to Gibson, Integrated Attachment Theory, and this is to tackle core wounds, learn your needs, learn to emotionally regulate, develop boundaries, communicate better, and update old behavioral coping mechanisms.

00:29:56:18 - 00:30:16:06
Mike DiZio
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00:30:16:08 - 00:30:35:08
Mike DiZio
And on top of that, included in this 30% off promotion for life, you also gain access to a daily live events webinars. I'll be there three days a week to answer any questions that you have in your journey. And we have amazing certified integrated attachment theory experts who are there to support you with their daily live events and webinars.

00:30:35:13 - 00:30:53:23
Mike DiZio
Monday through Saturday and this is a great opportunity to connect with like minded people to get your questions answered and receive any extra bonus support that you need. And last but not least, we even have social events on a daily basis so you can practice through sharing circle being a little bit more vulnerable, connecting with other like minded people.

00:30:54:00 - 00:31:12:06
Mike DiZio
You can practice through communication scripts, having tough conversations and really modeling that out. And there are so many other supportive events that are there for you on your journey. So I would love for you to join and take this opportunity. I would love for you to be part of this challenge to become securely attached within that 90 day period.

00:31:12:12 - 00:31:14:05
Mike DiZio
And I can't wait to see you on the other side.

00:31:14:05 - 00:31:32:19

Okay. So self-care and rituals. We always ask our guests what they're doing because we want to inspire people to do things on a daily basis. You know, sometimes we get caught up in this giant thing of self-healing, but really it's a lot of the daily things that we do that's going to add up in the long run.

00:31:32:21 - 00:31:57:18

So for you, what are some sort of self-care daily rituals that you do to keep yourself in a really good place? Yeah, really good question. I meditate no matter what. Every day. Sometimes I fall asleep sitting up during my meditation, sometimes like meditating, I can't stay awake past like 12 minutes or something, but I always like, I'll do a quick morning meditation for five or 10 minutes and that that will be like a meditation.

00:31:57:18 - 00:32:19:07

More to like, I'll meditate in like silence for 5 minutes, but then I'll usually spend 5 minutes, like just what's out for my day today. Like what's going on for today? How do you want to show up? What are the things I want to remember? Like just organizing my thoughts about the day and being intentional. And then every night I try to meditate for 20 to 30 minutes no matter what, even if I'm falling asleep by myself and like I set that time out right.

00:32:19:07 - 00:32:37:06

And that's really my time to like, plug into me, to reflect on my day, to see like, what's affected me, what it was exciting for me, what I want to do more of. And I feel like it just helps me, no matter what is a baseline, no matter how busy life gets or anything like that. Just like maintain relationship to self, like maintain connection to myself.

00:32:37:11 - 00:32:58:09

So that's huge. I also make a huge fan of something called A Course in Miracles. So you you like of course in Miracles last and read through it journal about it. Sort of like gather my thoughts on what that means to me and how it really plugs into my life and applies to that. And then the other thing is it's a small thing, but I really do believe, like this is such a small thing that I always go such a long way.

00:32:58:11 - 00:33:12:00

It's like at the end of the night, like Graham and I will get into bed, we'll be like, What was the favorite part of your day? What are you most grateful for today? And we'll talk about the things that are good because I feel like the mind can always so easily focus on like this little thing or that little thing that wasn't good.

00:33:12:00 - 00:33:26:14

And I feel like there's so much to appreciate. But just like our mind, like we always talk about this in PDX, like your mind is condition to focus on negative it like is wired that way. Like if you accidentally crossed by a bear in the forest, like you're not like, Oh, I remember the pretty tree by the bear yesterday.

00:33:26:14 - 00:33:45:00

Like you remember the bear and its teeth, right? So like, your mind's wired to hone in more on those negative things. And it's like you can see how over time for people, it can like just you can get so focused on the negative. So really like unplugging your mind from that all the time and not like what we have to make sure we do tomorrow and what will we have to make sure happens the next day.

00:33:45:00 - 00:34:04:00

Like just getting into like what was amazing about today, Like what was awesome? Like what was the favorite part and really talking it out with a partner. I feel like it's so nice because you, you get like that. When we talk about Reprograming like you need a repetition, you need emotion, you need specific. So like kind of having that conversation every day really helps you to like take in all the things that are there that are amazing.

00:34:04:02 - 00:34:22:05

And that's something like a routine we've just had standing for a really long time. So I would say those are three huge things for sure, and especially in the evening, like I'll really take time, like the meditation, I'll do a Course in Miracles first usually, or read something that's just like psychological, spiritual or something. And just like, how does this apply to me right now?

00:34:22:05 - 00:34:44:00

Like, what is this? How can I like, apply this to my own life? And just it keeps the introspection there and the self-awareness there all the time. Yeah, I love I share verbally sort of what you went through in the day and the things that you're grateful for and good things that happened during the day. Because I'm just thinking in my own life, sometimes in bed I take like a mental inventory of like good things that happen that day.

00:34:44:02 - 00:35:14:16

But in my mind, it probably just looks like a bullet point form of I worked out today. I held space for someone for 20 minutes and they felt better. But if I'm not sort of talk it out or maybe journaling it in detail, it's probably not landing as well as it should. So it's just giving me an idea that I should probably talk it out with someone and really sort of you're almost like reliving it an uncertain sense and getting the happy chemicals or whatever, you know, positive chemicals you're experiencing during that moment.

00:35:14:16 - 00:35:36:02

You're kind of reliving it and just imprinting it a little more pronounced on your on your brain, on everything. Yeah. And it's so interesting to you because it's like the either subconscious mind speaks for like the emotion and imagery. Sometimes if you go bullet points, it's like your subconscious is like you just get all these little point things that you'll get to like relish in, like the emotional imagery and the specifics.

00:35:36:02 - 00:35:55:03

And so, like, the more you do that, the deeper it kind of lands. So yeah, that's really a great point. And then I'm not a big meditation buff and it was really interesting how you were saying you just carve out that time and it doesn't have to be like a special type of meditation or you don't have to sit there and just quiet your thoughts completely.

00:35:55:05 - 00:36:14:21

From what I gather you were saying, it's more so just having that time, spending that time with yourself and yourself only there's nothing external sort of distracting or pulling your attention. It's like you sitting with yourself and sort of seeing what's going on for you and what's coming up. That's fair to say. Yeah, yeah. And I like to, you know, like there's like PDFs.

00:36:14:22 - 00:36:33:24

We've got lots of stuff going on all the time and there's lots of things that are happening. And, and, you know, I absolutely love what I do. Like, I couldn't love it any more than I love it. And I need a space. I need a pocket of time that's like, I don't have to answer anything to anybody. I don't have to be like remembering so many things at once.

00:36:33:24 - 00:36:55:02

It is like my space where I have no commitments to anything. It's like I'm just going to be here. If I fall asleep and I wake back up about halfway through, I'm going to keep going. Like whatever it is, it's like my, like expectation, commitment, free zone where I can just like, be with myself as I am. It's so funny because like, all the things will come up, then you'll be like, Oh, interesting.

00:36:55:02 - 00:37:14:00

I realize this about myself and like, you're just carving out that space for yourself. I think it's just like a really, really powerful thing to do. It's like an act of self-love for me. A little bit for sure. And are you going to have those realizations if you're just constantly doing things outside of it, right? So it's just so important to go inwards and sort of see what what's coming up for you.

00:37:14:02 - 00:37:42:14

That's awesome. And self-care, what is self-care looks like for times? Gibson Yeah, I would say self-care, like really funny because over time, like I, I didn't get here all at once, right? And like, I don't believe that somebody should try to do everything all at once. But like, we have multiple areas of life, right? To of your career financial, mental, emotional, spiritual, physical relationships and for whatever reason, probably because I was rebellious growing up, I really am not great at doing things I don't want to do.

00:37:42:16 - 00:38:09:01

Like if I don't want to do something like it's pretty tricky. Like I have a lot of like, well, I'm going to find a way to do. Not that my mind tends to go there, you know? And so, you know, from a self-care perspective, like I definitely have a baseline of things, like I make sure I eat super healthy, I make sure I exercise and move my body like six full days a week, like something really good and then like the seventh day all kind of chill or go for a long walk or something.

00:38:09:03 - 00:38:29:04

And then of course, like I do like spiritual emotional kind of dynamics every night where I'm like meditating and and going through and doing like A Course in Miracles. I'm like, but I would say self-care one thing that's really come to me over time is that like it's also caring for all areas of life. It's not just one area of life or like just the mental, emotional or spiritual areas of life.

00:38:29:04 - 00:38:51:20

It's like actually really digging into like having little habits for everything. So what was originally self care for me for a very long time was like just mental, emotional, spiritual, right? And it was like just having really good habits and stuff like that. But then I realized to holistic people. And so self-care is also like budgeting at the end of every week and like being in charge of my finances and like making a plan for my career and what I want to be doing.

00:38:51:20 - 00:39:07:00

And I was having this conversation with somebody the other day, and I really believe that, like we are not supposed to be just doing things that make us miserable. Like there's obviously always going to be some things you don't want to do. Like I don't love, like putting my taxes together and organizing my taxes. And I have to do that every year and things like that.

00:39:07:00 - 00:39:26:07

But I've one thing I've done over the past ten or 12 years is designed my life so that like I'm creating how I want to spend my time and not the other way around. And I was in a conversation was actually with Ben the other day and he was talking about Flow State and I was saying, it's interesting because like I tried to sort of design my life so that it's almost always in this flow state.

00:39:26:07 - 00:39:55:01

I wake up, I have got my little morning routine, I'm around people I really, really love, and then I'm like spending my day on meetings and doing things that I love or doing a webinar, having a chat with you or, you know, like everything. I'm like really grateful to show up for. And again, there's stuff like pay your taxes, do things that you have to get organized that are not my favorite, but they like 95% of my life is like I chose carve out a path that was going to match like what I wanted for myself and not thinking I had to be in someone else's path like that.

00:39:55:01 - 00:40:08:14

I should be doing it this way because society tells us so or because this is the way of doing things. And and so I think a big act of self-care and like something I would encourage everybody to do is do that. Don't let life determine what your life looks like, what your self determine what your life looks like.

00:40:08:14 - 00:40:24:01

An Even though it takes time to get there, like I didn't get to design what I felt like was a perfect life for me overnight. I plugged away at it for a long period of time and eventually everything kind of falls into place. And I know I want to go through changes like when we have our first child and things like that.

00:40:24:01 - 00:40:47:11

Like I know that there's going to be tweaks and shifts and there will be ups and downs with that. But I just feel like giving yourself permission to do that is the main thing for sure. That's amazing. And I know, you know, PDC members will know this and I know this, but was it in the determination of your needs once you found out what your sort of personal needs were, then it was sort of easy to sort of go towards those directions.

00:40:47:13 - 00:41:04:24

And if you don't know your needs, of course you're going to be doing things that, okay, let's let's try this job out or let's try this venture out. Not really thinking it might not be in your needs. And then you go towards it and then, you know, your body's telling you pretty quick, like, this is not what we like to do.

00:41:04:24 - 00:41:22:23

You know, you feel tired, you feel uninspired, weird. You can't wait for Friday. Like, there's just so many signs that your body's telling you that this is not what your sort of internal personality needs are wanting to do. Like your subconscious mind is almost trying to pull you and be like, Get away from that thing. Get away from that thing.

00:41:23:00 - 00:41:42:19

So I guess what is it in your needs determination where you've actually started to go? Okay, hey, these are the things I need to do and incorporate into my life 100%. Yeah. And so, yeah, thank you for saying that too, because it's funny, it's almost like your conscious mind has to build a relationship to your subconscious mind. We can trial and error things and then like hopefully end up in the best case scenario.

00:41:42:19 - 00:42:00:00

But if you don't know, like, why you want to be over here doing this thing, then you also are more likely to like accidentally make a mistake or risk it. Or like not stick around for things. So, so like, you know, to your point, for anybody who's listening, we talk a lot PD s about needs and like how we'll be subconscious needs.

00:42:00:00 - 00:42:19:05

And once you get consciously aware of your subconscious needs, you can be like, okay, these are the things that light me up. They're my personality needs or what I'm like, driven to move towards and like really programed to move towards. And it's like the more we live out of our needs, the more we'll feel, like frustrated and we'll procrastinate and we'll self-sabotage because it's not like we're actually self-sabotaging.

00:42:19:05 - 00:42:38:04

It's that our conscious mind sets a goal that our subconscious isn't interested in, and our subconscious mind runs the show at the end of the day. So you might say, Oh, I want to make more money. But if you have any personality needs related to money or security or wealth building or whatever it might be, that might be a really hard goal to achieve until you learn to line up your life and link these things together.

00:42:38:04 - 00:42:55:14

And so it's like the act of knowing your subconscious mind, understanding it, building a relationship to it, and then designing your life according to that is like how all of that happened. So yeah, thank you for saying that, because it's a really good reminder for anybody who doesn't know about that. Yeah, so impactful. I'll just think of an analogy almost too.

00:42:55:14 - 00:43:15:09

It's like if you were to just eat whatever food all the time, like some foods would make you feel good and some would make you feel awful, but you don't really know like you don't you're not sure which foods are which you've never taken the time to really isolate. Hey, when I eat apples, I feel amazing. When I eat right, I feel great when I don't feel good.

00:43:15:11 - 00:43:30:22

So it's in the needs determination and it's almost like, you know what you should be consuming. You know what you should be spending your time and energy on because it makes you feel good. But if you spend your time and energy on this stuff over here, you know, when you consume it, you know, you don't feel good at all.

00:43:30:24 - 00:43:51:21

So it's like that needs determination and you're figuring out what makes you the happiest, the most energized, the most fulfilled. And it's kind of easy because once you know that, just rinse and repeat. Just keep doing those things, keep filling those needs buckets. And as long as you're doing that each day, like there's no reason why you shouldn't feel feel great, like most days of the week, 100%.

00:43:51:22 - 00:44:10:06

That's a really good analogy. I'm going to borrow that. The really good one. I wanted to write about analogies and I'm like, not I didn't work, but that was something that I've been going through like the the, like the elimination food. I had like four foods and the deputy is like, yeah, good stuff with having a good dairy issue.

00:44:10:06 - 00:44:27:23

And I didn't know it. So I really resonate with that analogy here. It's like fine tuning all the foods and getting organized. Yeah, sure. Okay. So someone wants to know what's the most fun part of your job? I know you like a lot of it, but is there anything you're just like, all this is like the tops that really love this?

00:44:27:24 - 00:44:49:19

I would say like, my favorite part is like, definitely the webinar is just like getting to like, come in. I love hearing stories and their lives and like what they're going through and like what their experience is. And I get to see a lot of people, you know, three or four times a week and what ends up happening is I feel like I have a personal relationship to people, you know, and like what their I remember like what happened last time and what's happening this time.

00:44:49:19 - 00:45:08:19

And and so it's really, really nice to do that until like see people grow and see people support each other in the community and see people care and develop relationships between themselves too is so nice. So it's huge. And then I would say like it surprise me how much I've loved the business side of things because, you know, like I ran my practice before for, for quite a while.

00:45:08:19 - 00:45:30:03

And that's not like a business like it is in a sense where you're like a business owner, but it's like a sole proprietorship, like, you know, you're kind of just doing your thing on your own. And then like it's been a really cool for the past few years to like, learn to hire people and learn what to look for and interviewing people and, you know, like really like build out some of that side of the business and be involved there.

00:45:30:03 - 00:45:45:15

And then it's nice too, because I love everybody we work with. So it's like you have meetings with people you love talking to people. So that's been a really cool, I have to say, it's like way more fun than I ever expected. And I would have thought that I would like take to it so much. But that's been really, really cool as well.

00:45:45:17 - 00:46:09:20

But I would say for sure, by far the favorite thing is the webinars. The webinars for sure. I just know if you asked the question three years ago and then you come back three years later, I remember you and your situation and scenario. So your memory is on point with that stuff. I don't remember like average stuff, like normal everyday things like how to get somewhere without the GPS, but none of that.

00:46:09:20 - 00:46:34:11

It's like if people worries, I really do remember for a while that's that it makes everyone feel cared for, that's for sure. So just in your own personal life, what would you say you're most proud of achieving or accomplishing over the past few years? It's funny because I know this like very forward thinking and I probably don't like, sit and like acknowledge the wins enough, but I would say honestly, I would say, okay, there's two things.

00:46:34:14 - 00:46:57:04

One thing is that I'm proud that I gave myself permission to do what I want. That's a personal thing. It's not like a accomplishment oriented thing and like the outside world, but I'm not too big on the outside world stuff anyways. A lot of the time, like societal standards and things. But I would say that I remember years and years ago I was like, So in my practice I was starting my practice.

00:46:57:04 - 00:47:21:11

I loved working with people in that capacity. A lot. But I also knew that I love teaching a little more. So like when we do the weekend workshops and work with people, they're like, I loved teaching. Like that was like because you create content, you share it and like it reaches people. And I just loved that. And I remember thinking like, how am I going to do something where I'm like teaching more and all this information I have and all these things I want to share and teach you all these concepts I want to put out there.

00:47:21:11 - 00:47:45:07

Because again, for the client, like it takes a while to really teach a concept and then use it with them and then have them utilize it and get progress. Whereas like somebody can just take in all the information and understand it deeply. They can go apply themselves a lot more quickly. And I remember thinking like, how am I going to do something where I'm doing that and I can like package and like be paid to learn and teach and and that was what I wanted.

00:47:45:07 - 00:48:00:21

And so it's it's cool for me to be like, Oh my gosh, I gave myself permission and like, there wasn't like now a lot more people are doing online courses and stuff, but like four or five years ago there wasn't like a personal development school or things like that. So I felt grateful for that, like feeling grateful that I gave myself permission.

00:48:00:21 - 00:48:27:13

And I guess I would say I'm proud of that for sure. And then the second thing and like I wouldn't say that this is like a personal problem, but I definitely feel that like proud ness, but also for other people, it's like when I see people that there's some beautiful, beautiful, beautiful people and PBIS like some. And so we the people and I know, you know, but like there's some people have been through so much hardship and like such hard things and like, you know, I felt like I went through hard things in my journey.

00:48:27:13 - 00:48:54:15

But, you know, you see people have been through just so much worse. And then you see them just like thriving, like I can't take like, you know, I wouldn't necessarily say pride, like it's not you know, I'm sharing tools, but that's the person doing the heavy lifting in the work, right? So it's like, not on me, but I would say like my heart when I hear stories and people saying, Oh, I did this, or I'm in this space now, or I'm doing this new thing or, you know, and you can just see how much they've overcome, I'm so proud for that.

00:48:54:15 - 00:49:27:24

Like, I just feel like, wow, like this is amazing. And to see them, like, share it with each other or like, support each other or help each other out, you know, stuff like that, It's super, super rewarding. The of support that the community has for each other is like so unbelievable. Relative strangers who don't know each other are willing to spend so much time helping another person listening to their story, holding space for them, practicing like we have some routines where you can actually practice setting a boundary or practice delivering something very vulnerable.

00:49:28:01 - 00:49:48:24

But yeah, just to see how people are so willing to show up for each other is amazing. And you know, we're all in this together and we're all trying to get better. We're all trying to, you know, just figure this crazy life out. And it's just so nice to see the group of people that we've attracted. And what you've created allows for people to come in and sort of thrive.

00:49:49:01 - 00:50:12:17

One of my favorite things that I've observed is I host a lot of the routines in the school and a lot of times new people for these Zoom meetings, they won't be on camera. They're they're on mute and like, you barely know they're there, but they're listening in the background and over time and exposure and sort of learning the tools, changing their rooms, just developing more confidence, then you see them one day the camera's on.

00:50:12:18 - 00:50:37:14

You're like, okay, that's what so-and-so looks like. And then they start talking. And then months down the road they're just sharing so much. And if somebody has a question, they're the first to put their hands up and share. So for me, it's beautiful to see people sort of come into their selves and not be afraid and realize that they have as much to offer as me and you, then they have a lot to offer and they should show it and be proud of it.

00:50:37:16 - 00:51:04:07

For me personally, that's that's one of the things I love seeing and goes to what you're saying to like in the webinars, you see people's growth all the time and it's just such a great feeling. So I think we're lucky to both be able to witness that kind of ownership. So cool it, so cool. And it just like it's a reminder like I just feel so much like people are beautiful, like humans are going to thing and there's a lot of chaos in the world and there's like a lot of stuff going on in our world right now.

00:51:04:07 - 00:51:20:16

But like, I feel like when people just get the right tools and can peel back the hard stuff, maybe I'm like too idealistic sometimes, but I was going to say I was ready to go like, here and be like, we have students around the world and like maybe media news and all that stuff sometimes creates a little bit of division.

00:51:20:16 - 00:51:40:21

But when we get everyone together, like you just see everybody. Everybody's the same. Everybody's trying to heal, Everybody's trying to feel love and give love. And, you know, it's nice to see that on a micro level. And like you said, like humans are beautiful. It's just sort of there's a lot of that sort of that might kind of trick you into thinking they're not.

00:51:40:21 - 00:52:11:01

But really, people are mostly beautiful. It's pretty cool. We should have a shirt. What's it called? Sing Kumbaya and Hold hands. But down the rabbit hole there, we should get together. We would go down the rabbit hole for like hours of stuff. I that's probably why we get along so well. Okay, so we're coming towards the end of our questions, but we've got a few more here.

00:52:11:01 - 00:52:28:02

Are you still good with us? Oh, yeah, I'm good. Okay. Okay. Where do you see yourself in five years from now? So I would say like, I guess the big next stage of my journey career wise, doing exactly what I'm doing. Like, I don't see that changing at any point in time. I mean, knock on wood, because I love it.

00:52:28:02 - 00:52:51:12

So I don't know anything to change. Obviously, growing and expanding and like really putting out more tools and resources for more people. And another thing we're working on in the background, just chipping away at slowly but surely as kids and just having like distilled content, like on a smaller level for kids to learn to like regulate their emotions and learn their needs, just like learn emotional literacy and like a really easy way that's tangible for children.

00:52:51:12 - 00:53:20:18

So really excited for that. And then also to be a parent, you know, I grew up kind of being like terrified of ever getting married or having kids and then realizing that so much of that in my adolescence just came from like a woundedness place and then kind of arriving slowly but surely over the years at this place where I'm really, really excited and then realizing like, okay, I'm working a little too much for that to be feasible right now and trying to kind of redesign my life so that that can be more in balance so that there's really space for that to happen.

00:53:20:20 - 00:53:50:05

And I'm sure it's going to be like very you know, sometimes it's tricky because it's like, I just love how everything is right now so much and I feel like I'm in this like beautiful homeostasis of like balance and doing everything I love. And I know that like, at the moment I have a child that's going to be, like, totally disrupted and like, it's going to be like, Oh my gosh, like everything, you know, I have like a great routine and I have all this stuff and I know that's all going to become like totally stripped away and I know that it's going to be worth it and it's going to be a really amazing

00:53:50:05 - 00:54:06:06

journey. And so I know Graeme's really excited for kids, too, and and really ready and, you know, like we're we're sort of embarking on like, okay, like probably next year. But I'm excited for that. I would say that's a kind of a big part of the next five years for me. Probably it's giving you the most secure kid in history.

00:54:06:08 - 00:54:25:24

Yeah. We're going to have you on the podcast for sure, him or her. So I guess one day for sure, but good, good. So you already mentioned kids. That's like super exciting. Is there anything else coming up in the near future that we can kind of get personal? Another school member is excited about that might be coming. Yeah, for the members.

00:54:26:00 - 00:54:54:06

I'm not sure when this will be launch, but probably, you know, probably two weeks after this episode gets launched or so, we're going to have a full app, which is really exciting for us is what it means is like everybody can access content from their phone and all these different things. And then probably within three or four weeks after that, according to our roadmap, you know, assuming everything goes smoothly, soon after that, we'll have like gamification where you can like earn points for completing things and just some really cool features that are coming down the pipeline.

00:54:54:06 - 00:55:12:15

Also like a community feature where people can have little social profiles and connect with each other. So lots of really cool things coming down the pipeline and that way for sure. That's amazing. I know a lot of people are going to be excited about the app for sure. We're sure that's coming out soon. Okay. And then like, yeah, that's that's all the user questions.

00:55:12:15 - 00:55:33:09

That's all the questions I have for today. Thanks so much for your time taste. Is there anything else you wanted to say? Anything else you want to share? I would just say it like a huge thank you to everybody because I mean, like I'm very acutely aware at the same time that I get to do all these things that I love every day because people want to listen and trust the tools and like the things that we create here as a team.

00:55:33:09 - 00:55:55:17

And and I'm just so, so grateful for that and grateful, too, that like I say, there's a lot in the webinars, but like, you know, I go into the webinars and, you know, I'll wrap up the webinars and sometimes I'll ask like feedback questions like, Oh, enter this and this will go back and scroll through the comments at the end and, and like you just see people being so supportive of each other and just like somebody expresses something, all these people pour in their support.

00:55:55:19 - 00:56:14:24

I guess just to anybody listening, like thank you for that. It's such a special thing to see and to like go back and watch. And it definitely is that reminder, like, wow, like look at all these beautiful parts of us that we have and that we are so really, really grateful to everybody for for listening, for tuning in, for being a part of this journey as well, and for for trusting me and others.

00:56:14:24 - 00:56:39:02

And, and, you know, our whole team at PDL so that we can sort of share and be doing what we're doing. That's fantastic. Thank you so much for sharing. We'll check in with you again for sure. We back in like a month. We'll be like amazing weather standing monthly. Thanks for coming. And to all our people and our listeners, thank you for being here today and good luck in all your relationships, your healing.

00:56:39:02 - 00:56:52:07

And we'll see you on the next podcast and come in. If you come to come in, not just to the webinars with me, but come in to Mike's routines, make those amazing social routines with everybody. And so join him in there as well for sure. I'd love to see.