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Thais
Hello and welcome.

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Thais
To the Personal Development School Podcast. I'm your host,  Thais Gibson, and I create regular podcast episodes to teach you about your relationships, attachment style and the subconscious mind. My goal of this podcast is to give you tools and awareness you need to thrive in your relationships, feel deeply connected, and find harmony and fulfillment in your relationships and personal life.

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Thais
So I hope you tune in here with me each and every week.

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Thais
I want to talk to you about the different types of anxiety that I see people experiencing and struggling with the most often. And then for each type of specific anxiety, whether it's socializing by workplace anxiety, relationship triggered anxiety, general anxiety, whatever type of anxiety you're experiencing, I'm going to give you very specific strategies and solutions for how to work through this and reprogram your subconscious brain to start making new associations and be able to let go of this and free yourself from this once and for all.

00:01:14:07 - 00:01:40:04
Thais
So let's add about social anxiety in this video. It's something that so many people struggle with. Research shows that over 50% of the population experience is ongoing social anxiety during some period of their lives. So let's talk about what create social anxiety. Well, social anxiety is largely created by limiting beliefs or fears we have about our interactions with people.

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Thais
And what's really interesting is I want you to imagine for one moment that you're on your way to some kind of social event, a networking event, a party, whatever it is, you're on your way there. And imagine just for one moment that you couldn't have thoughts about people. You couldn't have any negative thoughts. You just weren't able you could put your mind fully on pause.

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Thais
So you're not able to have negative thoughts about people in general. What do you think would happen to your anxiety? What you would see is your anxiety would go way down. It's actually those autopilot thoughts you're having about people in advance. It's producing that frontal lobe response. It's creating all of those anxious feelings because the thoughts produce feelings and then feelings will then feed more negative or fear based thoughts.

00:02:26:10 - 00:02:50:04
Thais
Okay, so here are the common beliefs or fears I found around social anxiety, and I'm going to show you what to do with that fear of being shamed or rejected. Fear of not being good enough. Fear of being disliked. Fear of being excluded. Fear of being abandoned. Fear standing out in a negative way. Those are the main ones I see the most.

00:02:50:04 - 00:03:17:18
Thais
And these are actually belief based programs that we contracted or adopted at some point during our early lives, usually during childhood, some kind of early childhood experience. Maybe you were bullied, maybe you were made fun of something happened to you, and then that experience imprinted your subconscious mind, your brain every time you're going to go into an event where that situation might occur again, your subconscious mind is going to remind you of it and get you to fear it so that you can protect yourself from the potential danger.

00:03:18:04 - 00:03:39:18
Thais
But this actually doesn't serve us well. Increasing it. Usually this protective mechanism actually doesn't do a whole lot for our anxious feelings or well-being. So one of the best ways and I'm going to give you different tools for different anxiety in each of the following videos. One of the best ways to desensitize to some of these fears is through exposure response work.

00:03:40:18 - 00:04:19:07
Thais
So here's what this is what this really means. Exposure response work is essentially at a high level in you picking a specific fear that you have and incrementally exposing yourself to it in tiny, tiny doses and then intentionally, with your conscious mind, releasing new emotional responses, initially creating new feelings essentially to this experience. So, for example, let's say you have a fear of being not good at what you're going to do is over time, you're going to expose yourself to situations where you might feel out of your comfort zone, where you might feel not 100% good enough to do something and you're going to try it anyways in very small doses.

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Thais
So maybe you feel not good enough when it's talking to somebody of the opposite sex at a networking party or speed dating or something that's really forcing you to dive into those fears that way. What you would do is instead of going right into something like speed dating, which could be the extreme exposure to your fear, you might start with something like smiling at somebody of the opposite sex at a restaurant and just like looking at them and smiling.

00:04:44:10 - 00:05:02:21
Thais
Then the next time you might say hi to the person and then the next time you might try to strike up a conversation with the third person, Right? So every time you are incrementally exposing yourself a little bit more to your fear, and then what you have to do to accompany this is create a new positive emotional associations, the experience.

00:05:03:03 - 00:05:22:13
Thais
So, for example, maybe you smile at the person and maybe the person doesn't even smile back or acknowledge you, but your job is seeing your conscious mind to go, Was that really that bad? I'm still safe. I'm still okay. And guess what? I'm courageous for having done that. I'm doing this. I'm exposing myself. But keep doing this. It's going to get easier and easier.

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Thais
I'm going to keep growing Your thinking thoughts that are empowering you and what you're doing is exposing yourself to your old fear and creating a new intentional emotional response on purpose using your conscious mind. And that's what it communicates your subconscious mind. Hey, this is actually okay. We're actually saying this isn't that bad and it's going to equilibrate that old negative sort emotional response.

00:05:44:18 - 00:06:03:24
Thais
So pick what it is that you want to focus on. Pick little increments for how you can warm yourself up to breaking through all the way to that end goal. And then every time you choose to confront it, an incremental step on your way to that goal. That goal is to meet somebody that you can ask out or get their phone number and some kind of social context.

00:06:04:03 - 00:06:28:24
Thais
You know, you take all those little incremental steps, smile at somebody first, say hi to somebody, another strike up a conversation another time, strike up a longer conversation, then ask for it. So see how you're working it up and then each time reinforce thinking intentionally. That creates a positive emotional outlet. Do this, you are going to see massive changes happen for you in a fairly short period of time.

00:06:28:24 - 00:06:50:16
Thais
I just want to jump in here and let you know that we are doing a 14 day free trial, which means you get access to the personal department, school and everything we have going on on the other side for free for 14 days. That means you get access to the four live webinars I do every single week. You can come in, you can ask me questions with your camera on, we can chat, you can leave your camera off if you prefer, or type your questions in the chat.

00:06:50:16 - 00:07:12:00
Thais
There's lots of opportunity to get your questions answered and on top of that you get access to all of our different courses. We have over 55 different courses on relationships, communication boundaries, emotional mastery, guilt and shame, learning your needs, so many different facets that are really important to master our lives and feel really good about our lives going forward.

00:07:12:09 - 00:07:31:14
Thais
And last but not least, there's also community elements in there. So there's a daily community event, whether it's practicing communication or doing a guided morning routine or a guided reprograming exercise. We have trained facilitators and coaches who are in there doing that work, showing up to support you on your journey every single day. So I would love to see you on the other side.

00:07:31:14 - 00:07:50:02
Thais
There's lots of exciting stuff in there and we have had a 99.7% NPS score, which means we have literally that many people who report being really successful price and wanting to recommend us to others. And it was all done anonymously. So I felt really honored that everybody shared that. So thank you to those who did. But yeah, please join me on the other side.

00:07:50:02 - 00:07:54:18
Thais
Come check it out, see if it's a book for you. I'd love to see you there.